After celebrating the end of 2014, we all are creating a list of unattainable and unrealistic goals that somehow will give us a positive outlook on the year ahead of us. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you can’t stay away from Taco Bell forever and you aren’t going to stop swearing.
A New Year’s resolution should be something you know you can actually get accomplished. Maybe that means you should aim to give more compliments, to drink more water, or to call your mom more often. Generally, we set the bar too high and end up telling ourselves “maybe next year,” and “you tried your best.” I don’t know when that attitude became socially acceptable, but you and I both know this mindset is applauded more often than it once was.
To be completely honest, I never make New Year’s resolutions. I tend to find them cliché, and if you really want to change an aspect about yourself, you will find a way to do so. A promise that you make to yourself at the beginning of the year really doesn’t give you the motivation to make a change. And promises just end up being broken. Especially when you give yourself a 365 day time frame to let your promises become defective.
Although, it is a rare occurrence that I make a New Year’s resolution, this year, I forced myself against my own will to come up with something (just one). And I’m going make it pretty general.
To stop asking for permission.
What does that mean and how is it accomplished?
It’s broad for a reason. Its purpose does not entail doing just whatever I please for the heck of it or letting go of my own personal values and morals. I like who I am, and would rather not lose that. But sometimes, when I want to do something for myself, like buying a pair of shoes or planning to study abroad, I feel like I need a second opinion. And after asking for a second opinion I feel like I let someone else decide decisions on my behalf that I should make on my own.
Simple things like asking, “Should I buy these shoes, are they cute?” “Is this hair color pretty, could I pull it off?” I’m guilty of asking my friends questions like these on a daily basis. Although they are such small aspects of my life, it’s stressful when someone talks you out of something that could have made you happy. Remember, it’s your happiness that matters. Sometimes, we tend to forget that.
Or asking society for permission. One thing I like to do, and do often is eat everything and anything. Society says that’s bad. Which makes me believe cutting my diet to salad and water is a great idea. But you know what, just because society doesn’t like the way this pizza looks in a bikini doesn’t mean I shouldn’t eat the whole thing in one sitting. (*Disclaimer: For the most part I actually care about eating healthy and respecting my body.. exercising when I'm feeling real crazy- but occasional indulgence is OK). I believe society and our peers set certain expectations that are just unattainable. Yet, we all work so hard to reach those expectations rather than doing what WE want to do for OURSELVES. It may sound selfish, but being true to yourself and making yourself happy first might just be the key to a successful life.
I’ll also stop asking for permission on a much larger scale. When we are faced with opportunities on such a large scale that include risks and possible losses, we become fearful. Making a decision because you asked fear for permission first will make you miss out on a lot. Living in fear and losing experiences because of a mindset begins an oppressive downward spiral. This year, I will do something that scares me, and accomplish something I once believed I could not do.
All I want is to be satisfied with MY decisions. Not someone else’s decisions for me. This year I will make a point to take a step and lead myself to do what I want to do. To be whom I want to be. It’s something I’ll have to remind myself daily; that if it’s something I want, I need to just do it. Just do it; without consultation, without second thoughts, and to take a leap even if that means I fall into a muddy puddle muzzled with worms. Risk and reward go hand in hand, and all it takes is one step forward to begin the journey to get to where you’re going. Cheers to a New Year, and may this year be the one you will never forget.
A New Year’s resolution should be something you know you can actually get accomplished. Maybe that means you should aim to give more compliments, to drink more water, or to call your mom more often. Generally, we set the bar too high and end up telling ourselves “maybe next year,” and “you tried your best.” I don’t know when that attitude became socially acceptable, but you and I both know this mindset is applauded more often than it once was.
To be completely honest, I never make New Year’s resolutions. I tend to find them cliché, and if you really want to change an aspect about yourself, you will find a way to do so. A promise that you make to yourself at the beginning of the year really doesn’t give you the motivation to make a change. And promises just end up being broken. Especially when you give yourself a 365 day time frame to let your promises become defective.
Although, it is a rare occurrence that I make a New Year’s resolution, this year, I forced myself against my own will to come up with something (just one). And I’m going make it pretty general.
To stop asking for permission.
What does that mean and how is it accomplished?
It’s broad for a reason. Its purpose does not entail doing just whatever I please for the heck of it or letting go of my own personal values and morals. I like who I am, and would rather not lose that. But sometimes, when I want to do something for myself, like buying a pair of shoes or planning to study abroad, I feel like I need a second opinion. And after asking for a second opinion I feel like I let someone else decide decisions on my behalf that I should make on my own.
Simple things like asking, “Should I buy these shoes, are they cute?” “Is this hair color pretty, could I pull it off?” I’m guilty of asking my friends questions like these on a daily basis. Although they are such small aspects of my life, it’s stressful when someone talks you out of something that could have made you happy. Remember, it’s your happiness that matters. Sometimes, we tend to forget that.
Or asking society for permission. One thing I like to do, and do often is eat everything and anything. Society says that’s bad. Which makes me believe cutting my diet to salad and water is a great idea. But you know what, just because society doesn’t like the way this pizza looks in a bikini doesn’t mean I shouldn’t eat the whole thing in one sitting. (*Disclaimer: For the most part I actually care about eating healthy and respecting my body.. exercising when I'm feeling real crazy- but occasional indulgence is OK). I believe society and our peers set certain expectations that are just unattainable. Yet, we all work so hard to reach those expectations rather than doing what WE want to do for OURSELVES. It may sound selfish, but being true to yourself and making yourself happy first might just be the key to a successful life.
I’ll also stop asking for permission on a much larger scale. When we are faced with opportunities on such a large scale that include risks and possible losses, we become fearful. Making a decision because you asked fear for permission first will make you miss out on a lot. Living in fear and losing experiences because of a mindset begins an oppressive downward spiral. This year, I will do something that scares me, and accomplish something I once believed I could not do.
All I want is to be satisfied with MY decisions. Not someone else’s decisions for me. This year I will make a point to take a step and lead myself to do what I want to do. To be whom I want to be. It’s something I’ll have to remind myself daily; that if it’s something I want, I need to just do it. Just do it; without consultation, without second thoughts, and to take a leap even if that means I fall into a muddy puddle muzzled with worms. Risk and reward go hand in hand, and all it takes is one step forward to begin the journey to get to where you’re going. Cheers to a New Year, and may this year be the one you will never forget.